The title is a bit of an over dramatisation of what really happened, but basically long story short - I tackled a lot of my anxieties in this game today and damn it felt good.Never having been one to raid before because I hate screwing up when it means it affects others too. But I thought screw it, it's just a game, and all the players are people and if I have fun with it I'm sure things will be okay. I applied to some heroic en raids (yes I know it's old content but whatever). Got rejected for all of them. Didn't let that stop me. Made my own damn raid. Why? Cos I'm a big boy now okay. Invited whoever applied regardless of ilvl. The range ended up being between ilvl 850-870. Didn't know fuck all about raid comps but had a good mix of ranged and melee and we had a 239 comp (there may be other lingo people use to describe the comp but I don't know shit all okay?) . Didn't ask for no fucking aotc cos fuck that I won't be an oppressor. All I asked for in the lfg notes was that applicants whisper me and promise to be nice. And that they did. This fucking pug cleared en with only two wipes. One on ursoc and one on a face pulled xavius. One person complained on the ursoc wipe and asked one of the other members be kicked. Get fucked ya drongo I don't drop people for bullshit reasons this is my raid. I made sure of reminding him of it too. He agreed and didn't talk shit again. Of course he didn't because his God damn amazing raid leader which is me BTW, told him so. It was a damn good time and so many people got upgrades. Four people got legendaries. Everyone was happy and I God damn made sure they were.Straight after the raid you know what I fucking did? I opened my bags and realised I had a mythic keystone in there which is something I have never used before because I am a little anxious fuck and am afraid of a challenge and internet ridicule. Not today sir, today my innards were made of metal and my shoulders were rated to carry the weight of Mount Olympus itself. I put up another list for my keystone, it was a +2 votw. I hate that place so damn much. What better way to prove my hatred than to wipe the floor with those pissy little demons and demon hunters in quick time? Once again not being a gatekeeper and allowing the group to fill naturally. This time I ticked the auto invite box. Group was filled quick. Fuck knows what the ilvl of these people were but like hell I care. We smashed it. Two chested it. Yeah it's not three but go shag yourself a sheep ya judgemental prick. Two people dropped group at the end but the offer was open to those who remained to stay with me and see how far we go. Now this key sits in my bags as a 11 votw. No I'm not gonna touch that. I have balls today but they hurt from sitting for so long, plus this is where my newly acquired yet almost expired confidence ends. I got some upgrades throughout the day, started at ilvl 860 and finished at 868. But the real power increase was in real life. I now walk around with my God damn chin so high up in the air im tickling the man aboves feet with the wirey hairs of my sad excuse of a goatee. I sit with my legs spread so far apart I may as well be doing the splits. God damn I even stopped using deodorant because nothing smells sweeter than the natural odor of success.In all seriousness though, I had lots of fun today. I think my greatest enemy in this game has not been those who I thought I was afraid to upset, but my own conscious. If you were one of the people who was a part of any of these. Thank you. I ended up applying to and doing heaps of +2 to +6s for the rest of the day. Thanks to those who took me.